racing against sunbeams

The Sam Raimi classic “The Evil Dead” scared the living daylights out of me when my dad made me watch it when I was 10. I remember having nightmares about the zombified Linda’s hysterical laugh and vowing to stay away from cellar doors–even though I’ve never seen one–in fear of Cheryl coming out.

no, this isn't from "The Exorcist"

I also remember wanting a chainsaw for Christmas.

Watching ” The Evil Dead,” however, was a painful but necessary initiation rite into the wonderful world of zombie movies.  George Romero is now one of my heroes. You’re not  my friend if you haven’t seen “28 Days Later” and/or “28 Weeks Later,” the best zombie movies in recent years. And I now judge a vehicle by its capacity to protect me from zombies.

My sister, who is almost as into this as I am, agrees that there is wisdom in having a panic room just like in “Diary of the Dead.” Tweaked according to my personal preferences, the room would include the following:

1. Dozens of screens showing views from hidden cameras strategically placed in various parts of the house. This is a must for all panic rooms.

2. DVDs, lots. In case I get bored monitoring the cameras. DVD collection to include “Mean Girls” and “Kung Fu Panda.”

3. All kinds of firearms imaginable, with tons of ammo to boot. Also, a crossbow would be nice. It won’t be very effective against zombies, but it would be…nice.

4. A sword! A samurai sword!

5. Mountains of food, including the ever-reliable chicken adobo, chocolate chip cookies, and ingredients for making pizza.

6. A personal computer or a laptop with Internet connection and all the music files I need to keep me sane and cool. That reminds me: room will also include drums and a guitar so I can hone my musical skills while I’m stuck there.

6. Books.

7. One to three companions; preferably male, decent-looking, smart, funny, and reasonably strong.

I am so saving this list for future reference.